The restaurant in Sopher’s Hole was very busy the night we ate there.  The waitresses looked a bit overwhelmed, and that should have been a sign.  Audrey, a rather large and harried waitress, pulled some tables together for us.  From the beginning, things didn’t go well.  It took a long time for her to bring only half of the drinks.  We waited and waited and she finally took our food order.  Dan ordered the rib dinner.  Audrey was confused as to whether he wanted the dinner or not as there was also a rib appetizer.  Dan pointed out the dinner on the menu that was priced at $12.95.  Much later our food came and she didn’t bring enough plates for the kids pizza.  Then we order some more drinks and she disappeared.    She was gone for at least twenty minutes.  In fact we thought she forgot about us.  Needless to say we weren’t impressed with the service.  When the bill finally came, I checked it over as usual, and she had charged Dan $25.95 for the ribs.  Dan was sure the price was $12.95 and sent Tessa up to get a menu to double check.  Sure enough, this menu said $12.95.  I left it to Dan to sort out while I went to the restroom. 

When I came back, they all filled me in on the story.  Audrey came back to the table and Dan pointed out the mistake on the bill.  He told her that his meal should have cost $12.95. That was the meal he ordered, not the $25.00 meal.   Audrey looked at him and replied,

“In my mind, you ordered the dinner.”

To himself Dan replied, “In my mind, you were a Hooter girl.” 

To Audrey  he said, “But I pointed to the $12.95 one on the menu.”

Then came the showdown.  Dan stared at Audrey.  Audrey stared at Dan.  A hush fell over the crowd.  After what seemed an eternity, Dan asked her, “So…. are you going to change it?”

Audrey snatched up the bill, snarling, “I’m gonna get the manager.”  She made her displeasure known by banging glasses, shoving chairs and slamming her rather large hips into tables, sending the silverware flying. Apparently it was quite a show and I was sorry I missed it.  When I came back, they were waiting for her to bring back the bill.  Soon she returned with the new bill showing the $12.95 dinner. That was good.  The new total for our bill was $63.00.  I told Dan to give me $70.00 as that would include tip.  We weren’t going to give her  a 15% tip because of her slow service and attitude, but I felt she was overwhelmed that evening so I didn’t want to leave her nothing.  First Dan gave me three twenty dollar bills, but I said I didn’t want to have to wait for change and we went back and forth and finally he put some money down.  Karon and Alan used their credit card, and we joked that Audrey was now in the back using their card for her own personal spending.

“Don’t you put that evil on me Ricky Bobby!”

We left the table and headed to the dinghy dock.  I again asked Dan how much he had left and he said sixty dollars.

“But our bill was $63.00.  I told you to leave $70.00.  You didn’t leave enough to even cover the bill.”

Audrey had him all confused.  He headed back to the table.  Audrey had already picked up the money so he left  the extra money on the table and came back to where we were standing.  He was still acting confused and not sure how he made a mistake.  Then it dawned on him.  He did leave $70.00 originally and now he just left ten more dollars.  Karon points out that now he just paid for the $25.00 dinner.

Dan made a beeline back to the table, and in his haste, nearly knocked Alan and I into the water.  Luckily Audrey hadn’t made it back to the table to collect the extra money and Dan was able to grab it and make it back to the dinghy without her noticing.

“What would you have done if she had the extra money in her hand when you got there?” 

We could just see Audrey sizing up Dan across the table.  “Are we doing this?” 

That would have been a story!